Grief – and children
There can be many childhood events that can cause grief in YOUR child:
Moving
Animal dying
Friend moving
Changing schools
Parent or grandparent dying
Parents divorcing
Many other things in YOUR child’s life can cause grief.
There are a few things that may help YOUR child go through that grief.
There are 5 stages of grief:
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance-is where we try to get to through our grief. This is just accepting the reality that our loved one is physically gone and recognize that this new reality is the permanent reality. Not that everything is ok and we are feeling all right. Or the fact YOU had to move to another area.
This is how I believe to help a child grieve – hold a little memorial service in your yard and plant a rose bush or a tree in memory of the loss.
But let them talk about their feelings and grief they feel.
Grief – will happen to all children
Listen without judgment
Children’s grief can come in cycles. Having fun or laughing is not disrespectful to the person who died, this is a vital part of grieving, too. Always give a child a choice whenever possible in the grieving process.
Talk about and remember the good memories and good times. Laugh about the fun and good times.
Grief is always going to be part of life for everyone. Wilting flowers, changing seasons, are opportunities to show death and grief are part of life.
Recognize fears. Death – can be a scary concept for children.
Let them see you grieve. Children need to know that grieving is acceptable. Allow children to see you cry. Emotional pain is part of losing a loved one.
Cherish the memories.
Children grieve in spurts – and the grief may come and go. A lot like adults really – our grief at a loss may also come and go over time. Then finally accepting the reality.
Words that will help your child
Grief – will happen to all children
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